You know when someone shares something really exciting with you... like they bought a new car, or they got a great deal on a washing machine that they got interest free for a year, or they turned in their credit card miles for a new sweater... and as a good friend you're expected to celebrate with them...
Well, I just want to say something like, "Well, Dave Ramsey says, 'You just made a horrible financial decision and here are thirty-three reasons why...'"
I guess you're not really supposed to respond like that. Apparently people don't want to hear the 33 reasons why they just made a horrible decision about anything. Who knew?
But, I don't want to glue on a plastic smile and pretend that I'm excited for them. Because these kinds of things scare the daylights out of me! It's not that I don't think a new-to-you car isn't exciting, nor do I think that washing machines and sweaters are from the pit of hell ... because I LOVE my washing machine and sweaters are nice too. I must admit that I have financed a car, bought a washing machine on a credit card and never got the miles to buy a sweater. And while the car is paid for (and no longer here) and the washing machine is paid for now... it wasn't a good deal. It hurt us. Our decisions hurt us.
Our financial practices were straight from the pit of hell, because they neither glorified God or helped our testimony. The message of the cross is freedom from sin and a new life in Christ. The message of a debt-ridden Christian is intentionally yoking yourself to a master of this world.
So, I need to pray about how to respond lovingly to my friends who are celebrating their new cars, new thises and thats ... instead of silently judging them (or not so silently judging them) and focus on how to be a great friend. I need to pray that God will give me the opportunity to share how our budget and new money management practices are leading us out of the pit of hell and into a new life and then invite them to join us on this journey.
How many of you struggle with watching your friends make poor financial decisions? Do you speak up or do you let them make their own mistakes? Since we've made sooooo many mistakes in the past I also struggle with saying, "Don't do that!!!" when we've been there and done that!! Do you feel this way?
Well, I just want to say something like, "Well, Dave Ramsey says, 'You just made a horrible financial decision and here are thirty-three reasons why...'"
I guess you're not really supposed to respond like that. Apparently people don't want to hear the 33 reasons why they just made a horrible decision about anything. Who knew?
But, I don't want to glue on a plastic smile and pretend that I'm excited for them. Because these kinds of things scare the daylights out of me! It's not that I don't think a new-to-you car isn't exciting, nor do I think that washing machines and sweaters are from the pit of hell ... because I LOVE my washing machine and sweaters are nice too. I must admit that I have financed a car, bought a washing machine on a credit card and never got the miles to buy a sweater. And while the car is paid for (and no longer here) and the washing machine is paid for now... it wasn't a good deal. It hurt us. Our decisions hurt us.
Our financial practices were straight from the pit of hell, because they neither glorified God or helped our testimony. The message of the cross is freedom from sin and a new life in Christ. The message of a debt-ridden Christian is intentionally yoking yourself to a master of this world.
So, I need to pray about how to respond lovingly to my friends who are celebrating their new cars, new thises and thats ... instead of silently judging them (or not so silently judging them) and focus on how to be a great friend. I need to pray that God will give me the opportunity to share how our budget and new money management practices are leading us out of the pit of hell and into a new life and then invite them to join us on this journey.
How many of you struggle with watching your friends make poor financial decisions? Do you speak up or do you let them make their own mistakes? Since we've made sooooo many mistakes in the past I also struggle with saying, "Don't do that!!!" when we've been there and done that!! Do you feel this way?
I am VERY glad to see that you are doing so well with this. I agree. It is difficult to say "Don't do that." without upsetting your friends. We have tried on few occasions, only to be made to look like the bad guys. Oh well, just trying to help people to not make the mistakes. You are right. It is not for US to judge, but for Him to judge. I feel your frustration on this one.
ReplyDeleteHow are you guys doing on your journey??
DeleteI guess offering help to others implies that they need help... something that we rarely like to admit that we need. I know I have a problem admitting that I need help, let alone that I might be wrong about something!
EXTREMELY well! Baby step #1 has been untouched for months! Holiday shopping is all being done w/ cash and we established our rules for where the money came over a month ago, and we're well into snowballing. As Jason said, it's so hard NOT to say, "OMGosh! DON'T do that!" We've had some of the same struggles you've encountered, but keep reminding ourselves that in the end, it'll all be soooooooo worth it! We've also found that with our budget, we have discovered ways we can give and not have it hurt us financially (thank you "blow fund") ~ that feels so amazing!
DeleteI'm so excited for you guys and us! ;) Saying no to ourselves is really the hardest part. We've found with our budget that it tells us "No, don't do that!" And sometimes it even says, "Yes go ahead and go out to eat, you planned for it!" We just went out to eat with my family and it felt so good knowing that eating out didn't mean we weren't paying a bill!
DeleteThat's freedom!